Fruitcake – Lyrics

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E = Explicit

A Nonsense Christmas
[INTRO]
It’s the holiday remix
Ah-ah

[VERSE 1]
Think I only want you under my mistletoe
I might change your contact to “Has a Huge North Pole”
You said you like my stockings better on the floor
Boy, I’ve been a bad girl, I guess I’m gettin’ coal, no

[PRE-CHORUS]
Let me come warm you up, you been out in the snow
Baby, my tongue goes numb, sounds like, “Ho, ho, ho”
I don’t want Santa’s elves underneath this ol’ tree
Here’s a lil’ carol I wrote, it’s about you and me (Me)

[CHORUS]
You’re my wish list
Lookin’ at you got me thinkin’ Christmas
Snowflakes in my stomach when we’re kissin’
And when you’re comin’ down the chimney
Oh, it feels so good
I need that Charles Dickens
You’ll be Santa Claus and I’ll be Mrs.
I’ll take you for a ride, I’ll be your Vixen
I don’t even know, I’m talkin’ Christmas
I’m talkin’, I’m talkin’ (Ah-ah-ah-ah)

[VERSE 2]
I’m talkin’ deckin’ all the halls
I’m talkin’ spikin’ eggnog
I’m talkin’ opposite of small
I’m talkin’ big snowballs
You got a new toy for me
I’m out here trimmin’ the tree
I caught that holiday glee
My true love gave it to me

[PRE-CHORUS]
Let me come warm you up, you been out in the snow
Baby, my tongue goes numb, sounds like, “Ho, ho, ho, ho”
And I don’t want Santa’s elves (Don’t want) underneath this ol’ tree (Tree)
Here’s a lil’ carol I wrote (Yeah), it’s about you and me

[CHORUS]
You’re my wish list (Wish list)
Lookin’ at you got me thinkin’ Christmas (Christmas)
Snowflakes in my stomach when we’re kissin’ (When we’re kissin’)
And when you’re comin’ down the chimney
Oh, it feels so good
I need that Charles Dickens (No)
You’ll be Santa Claus and I’ll be Mrs. (Mrs., uh)
I’ll take you for a ride, I’ll be your Vixen
I don’t even know, I’m talkin’ Christmas (Oh-oh-oh)
I’m talkin’ (Talkin’), I’m talkin’, I’m talkin’ (Talkin’)
[Bridge]
I’m talkin’, I’m talkin’ (Na-na-na), I’m talkin’
(Blah-blah, blah-blah)
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah (Ah-ah)
I’m talkin’ chestnuts (Talkin’)
I’m talkin’, I’m talkin’

[OUTRO]
Look at all those presents, that’s a big sack
Boy, that package is too big to gift wrap
Woke up this morning, thought I’d write a Christ-smash
How quickly can you build a snowman? Think fast
Oh

Buy Me Presents E
[VERSE 1]
If you were a wise man, baby, you would drop
Every other ho, ho, ho and put me on top
Up there on your tree, better treat me like a star
Spend your cookie dough, dough, dough, spend it on my heart

[PRE-CHORUS]
Fuck the jet, send the sleigh
It’s a packed holiday, and I got options, babe (Ah)

[CHORUS]
If you don’t wanna buy me presents
Drink me like a warm glass of milk
If you’re not gonna race here from the
North Pole to Beverly Hills
Just to keep my stockin’ filled
Well, I know somebody who will (Uh-huh)

[POST-CHORUS]
(Somebody who will, somebody who will, somеbody who will)
(Buy me presents, baby)

[VERSE 2]
Hе’s a little bit older (Like, super old)
Got a bit of a dad bod
From a city that’s colder (Brrr)
But damn it, he’s so hot
He knows when I’m sleepin’ (Sleepin’)
And he knows when I’m not
I haven’t, like, seen him in a while
He’s probably just busy at his workshop

[PRE-CHORUS]
Fuck the jet (Fuck the jet), send the sleigh (Send the sleigh)
It’s a packed holiday, and I got options, babe (No)

[CHORUS]
If you don’t wanna buy me presents
Drink me like a warm glass of milk (Oh)
If you’re not gonna (You’re not gonna) race here from the
North Pole to Beverly Hills
Just to keep my stockin’ filled (So filled)
Well, I know somebody who will

[POST-CHORUS]
(Somebody who will, somebody who will, somebody who will)
(Buy me presents, baby)

[INSTRUMENTAL BRIDGE]

[CHORUS]
If you don’t wanna buy me presents
Drink me like a warm glass of milk (Drink me like a warm glass of milk)
If you’re not gonna (Oh) race here from the
North Pole to Beverly Hills
Just to keep my stockin’ filled
Oh, I know somebody who will

Santa Doesn’t Know You Like I Do
[INTRO]
Santa
Doesn’t know you like I do
I’ve been there through the good and bad
Know how to make you laugh
Kiss all your tears away, babe
Oh, only I can do that

[VERSE 1]
Why don’t you just come over?
You’ve been actin’ so cold (So cold)
No, I don’t want nothin’ crazy
Just wanna get you alone (Alone)
And all of the snow is fallin’ (Fallin’)
I can make you fall too (Fall too)
So tell me what’s on your wish list
I wanna make it come true (Oh)

[CHORUS]
Santa (No-no-no-no)
Doesn’t know you like I do (Oh no-no-no)
I’ve been there through the good and bad
Know how to make you laugh
Kiss all your tears away, babe
Oh, only I can do that
Santa
Doesn’t know you like I do
I know all of your favorite songs
Pick up each time you call
So why can’t I be the one
To give you everything you want?

[VERSE 2]
I just want you to tell me that you feel the same
I don’t think I’m gonna make it through the winter, babe
Well, don’t you wanna wrap me up and mistle-touch under the tree?
He won’t bring you somebody that loves you more than me, yeah

[CHORUS]
Santa (Oh no-no-no-no, Santa)
Doesn’t know you like I do (Doesn’t know you like I do)
I’ve been there through the good and bad
Know how to make you laugh
Kiss all your tears away, babe
Oh, only I can do that (Only I)
Santa (Oh no-no-no-no, Santa)
Doesn’t know you like I do (Doesn’t know you like I do)
I know all of your favorite songs
Pick up each time you call
So why can’t I be the one
To give you everything you want?

[BRIDGE]
You’re gonna leave me all alone? On Christmas?
Baby, what’d I ever do to deserve all that?
Can’t we just, like, snuggle underneath the tree? By the fireplace?
You know I make those cookies you like

[OUTRO]
Santa
Doesn’t know you like I do
Well, maybe this Christmastime
You’ll finally realize
That I could be the one
To give you everything you want

Cindy Lou Who
[VERSE 1]
I saw you laughin’ in one of his pictures
Bet you’ll be the one with his ring on your finger
There’s red and green everywhere, but I’m so blue
Cindy Lou Who
Maybe he met you somewhere in the desert
While he was soul-searchin’, he found someone better
Guess you make him happy like I couldn’t do
Cindy Lou Who

[CHORUS]
(Ooh) With your hair so long, lips so red
(Ooh) Maybe we met once, I forget
(Ooh) Scrollin’ five yеars back, I’m obsessed
Breakin’ my hеart, ’tis the season, I guess

[INSTRUMENTAL BREAK]

[CHORUS]
(Ooh) With your hair so long, lips so red
(Ooh) If you’re wakin’ up now in his old bed
(Ooh) At his family’s house, know that you’re just
Breakin’ my heart, ’tis the season, I guess

[VERSE 2]
The snow’s gonna fall and the tree’s gonna glisten
And I’m gonna puke at the thought of you kissin’
The boy who I love is now in love with you
Cindy Lou Who

[OUTRO]
I told all my friends, they said it can’t be true
Cindy Lou Who

Is It New Year's Yet?
[VERSE 1]
I’m sick and tired of this holiday
Not good at bein’ present anyway
The songs are catchy, but they’re overplayed
My relatives always know what to say to piss me off

[PRE-CHORUS]
Small talk in the kitchen
Dated, dumb traditions
Who sucks competition (Oh)
Call it pessimism
December is a prison
It just makes me miss him

[CHORUS]
Is it New Year’s yet?
I’m gettin’ bored, so can we skip ahead?
I just wanna forget
That I’m at home with nobody to hold
I’m dreamin’ ’bout silver and gold (Silver and gold)
That champagne buzz down to my toes (Down to my toes)
Someone, not you, kissin’ me, oh yes
Nеw Year’s, is it New Year’s yеt?

[VERSE 2]
Santa, Santa, boy, you’re the worst
It’s the 25th, I wish it was the 1st
Couples all around me, damn, it hurts
Wanna push ’em in the fireplace and watch ’em burn
Santa, Santa, why do you hate me?
I’m a gift, look how God made me
Never, never get what’s on my list
Fruitcake just makes me sick (Ugh)

[PRE-CHORUS]
Small talk in the kitchen
Dated, dumb traditions
Who sucks competition (Oh)
Call it pessimism
December is a prison
It just makes me miss him

[CHORUS]
Is it New Year’s yet?
I’m gettin’ bored, so can we skip ahead?
I just wanna forget
That I’m at home with nobody to hold
I’m dreamin’ ’bout silver and gold (Silver and gold)
That champagne buzz down to my toes (Down to my toes)
Someone, not you, kissin’ me, oh yes
New Year’s, is it New Year’s yet?

[OUTRO]
Uh, uh, uh
Is it New Year’s yet?

White Xmas (by Bing Crosby)
[INTRO]
I’m dreamin’ of a white Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
Where the treetops glisten and children listen
To hear sleigh bells in the snow, mmm

[PRE-CHORUS]
Da-da-da-dum, da-da, da-da-dum
(Da-da, da-da, da-da-da, da-da-dum)
Da-da-da-dum, da-da, da-da-dum
(Da-da, da-da, da)
I said

[CHORUS]
I’m dreamin’ of a white Christmas
(Da-da, da-da-dum, da-da, da-da-dum)
With every Christmas card I write, oh-oh
(Da-da, da-da-dum, da-da, da-da-dum)
May your days, may your days, may your days be merry and bright
And may all (All) your (Your) Christmases be (Da-da, da-da-dum)
White (Dum-dum-dum-dum-dum)
Da-da-da, oh

[CHORUS]
‘Cause I’m dreamin’ of a white Christmas
(Da-da, da-da-dum, da-da, da-da-dum)
Just like the ones I used to know
(Da-da, da-da-dum, da-da, da-da-dum)
May your days, may your days, may your days be merry and bright
And may all your Christmases be white

[OUTRO]
Jingle bells, the jingle bеlls
Jingle all the way
Ooh